Imaginary Side Job

So, in between being bored of my job, I entertain myself with computer games. Currently, I’ve been playing Digby Donut, a game much like donut tetris but only by matching icing colors. The scenario is that Digby is going to open up donut shops all over the USA and I need to help him stack the donuts and collect money to open new shops.

I’m 3 levels from the top level. I can’t seem to budge from this level! I’m trying really hard. A little obsessed to be honest. 

The irony? 

I’m wasting a lot of my time trying to pass this level. Call it a gamers curiosity but in my defense, it stimulates my brain rather than become mush to the office laptop with hardly any cool programs on it. What I’ve come to realize is... I’m such a dumb ass, escaping my real work to surrender to a imaginary job. Yes, job and not game. Here, my boss, Digby has a target to be the donut king. I’m his slave. Every time I drop a donut, he frowns. Everytime I misplace an order, he frowns. He also comments and says it’s my fault that I dropped the donuts he made. I can’t fuck up more than 5 times (by this level). If I do, he flips and closes the whole darn shop! Talk about a perfectionist.

See, although he says he perfects his recipe, he doesn’t move from his spot. He just sits there and watches me work. Sure, he smiles if I successfully stack up the right color of donuts or make an order right but seriously, I could use more credit. Sigh. It’s as hard to make it in the imaginary world as it is in the real one. 

Interestingly, a lot of games have similar scenarios, especially no-brainers like this. All we gamers run from one job to another. I'm wondering if people actually realize this conspiracy? *track in track out

On this note, there are still people obsessed with games. They could even live in internet cafes just to play online games. They could line up for 2 days and 2 nights at a store once a new game is to be released.  I used to think gamers waste so much time to play something unreal. To some extent, I still do. But I’ve come to understand that gamers mind is a bit twisted and brilliant at the same time. They game because they need a brain stimulator which they can not find in any other form, like music, knitting, painting, etc. They're like puzzle or chess players. They’re like novel readers but with more finger activities. And the harder they play, the more their brains are used. So, I'm watching out for those gamers out there. You might have a sick way of thinking deep down. Yeah, it’s also relative but it beats starring blankly at the TV (watching TV and paying attention is something entirely different).

So, some r.e.s.p.e.c.t to the gamers out there. I know, deep down, you are more than what you seem to be. Game on, guys!

It Was My Bird Day... 3 Months Ago

By 10 am on my bird-day, Mum came in the house screaming, “My dear child, is it your birthday? Dewi (the girl next door and seriously is a ‘girl next door’ type) told me it was. She saw it on Pesbuk (Facebook)” my mum comes to kiss me with her nose as a literal Indonesian interpretation of ‘cium’ as in sniff.

After she kissed me she mumbled ‘Well, it is a Christian tradition. But doesn’t matter! I’ll give you a present! Do you want an ice cream? There’s a seller outside’.

Sure. Why not? I nodded.

For a second I though it was the best present I’ve ever had. My Mum never remembers my birthday, let alone gives me prezzies. So I was gonna chow down that ice cream on bread like a dog that hasn’t eaten for a day.

My initial reaction:

Then I realized it was Durian flavor. Thus my reaction. Hhhhh… still one of my best presents eva! Gotta love my Mum! 

I Saw The Sign... And It Opened Up My Eyes

I'm back from another journey. I was so looking forward and really nervous about it just before I left.  Now, that I’ve comed back, I thought I’d blog about a few things I need reminded. I wrote this before I left and didn’t have the chance to upload it. So here it is.

It was the night of the 22nd of April 2010. It was dark but the streets of Larantuka was lit with hundreds, if not thousands, of candles of the Semana Santa ceremony. I was wearing all black and walking amongst the Catholic believers. Cindy was on my right and Tante Tuka, a local Denga Deo, was on my left. I was starting to feel tired after walking and standing for about 2 hours. I wanted the whole thing to end!

But I sucked it up. A process is a ‘whole’ when you can complete it, right? Right??? It then had me thinking, there I was still walking, standing, and amongst prayers which wasn’t my belief. I traveled to the end of Flores, chasing that certain moment, spending money, and spending energy not on my own religion. How did I get my priorities mixed up?

Right there and then, I decided, I have to save up for my own believes, at least I have to Umroh. It’s not like I’m an atheist or agnostic where I don’t do the rituals and stuff. I do. I do believe in God, the prophet, the hoo-haa’s, and I do some of the rituals (:P). So there really isn't excuse for me not to go. 

To be fair, Umroh is a journey which requires a lot more money. That’s one of the main reason I haven’t done it. So I started to save up. I also thought that it’s time to do the ‘journey’ amongst ‘journeies’, eventhough it is the shorter version of it. I like to travel and before I travel more, it’s time to take these travel to the core of traveling itself, to where the heart needs more. Back to God!

Need I add, I’m at an intersection of my life. I’m not really sure what path I should choose. Should I quit my job and my beliefs in this company? Should I accept the fact that I might stay single all mylife? What is it that life wants me to do and what do I want in life? The classic case of questioning my own existence. Seems like we’re never gonna step out of this ‘teen’ phase after all.

After the Manasik or a briefing on what we are going to do there, I learned that not all are fortunate enough to visit the holy land. It is a privileged invitation. Some might not want to just yet, some can’t afford it just yet, some might not experience it at all. Accodring to the preacher, they haven’t been invited. There’s nothing wrong with that. Everyone has different callings and process. But because he said that, and the fact that there are many that would love to see Baitullah or the holy house, I believed him. My stars so happened to align and bring me home to the holy house. I can afford it (Alhamdulilah), I have the time, the energy, and my boss permitted me to go.

What’s more bizzare is I realize that my calling was on that street in Larantuka in 2010, amongst the Catholic faithfuls in a Catholic ceremony. Is that a calling or what?

Having Fun with Pesimism

An Indonesian is a person that take all of their resources for granted.

• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented the heater/air radiator. Most of us will never experience extreme cold the whole year round.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented the refrigerator. We don’t need to save food through winter, we can access our fresh food all year around.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invent a trash can. We eat most of our produce including animal organs, and when we're done, we litter! We have a lot if bacteria to decay it.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented sun tan lotion or sun block. Our skin has enough melanin to survive daily life.
• An Indonesian wouldn’t enjoy sitting in the park, under the sun, and read a book. We have the sun all year around, why enjoy the existence of the sun when we have it every day?
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented the umbrella, there’s too many banana leaves and big surface leaves lying around to cover us.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invent the sleeping pill. We can get sleepy when it’s too hot or too cold.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented the fertilizer. What ever seed we throw on the ground, will grow anyways.
• An Indonesian couldn’t have invented mining. We’re content of what we have on the surface, why bother digging deep?
• An Indonesian wouldn’t have invented the barbel. We're poor, we can't be obese and we can't afford cars. We lift things ourselves.
• Best of all, an Indonesian couldn’t have invented the plane. We fly with mystical powers :D 

Hmmm what else? 

(Why invent a basket when you tie your fish on the back of your car?)

Orangutans, Deodorant, and The Dark Side (a.k.a Work)

There’s a lot of things that triggered this blog today:

1. Orangutan

I saw a picture of a blind Orangutan from a friend that was accompanying a rescue mission in Kalimantan. It put my heart in a shredder! Orangutan has been an issue since the palm oil trees have been massively expanded through out our country in the past 5 years. Palm oil plantations have been viciously protecting their goods because the Orangutans have been eating them. How can you blame the Orangutans? Their homes have been chopped down, they have no food but palm oil, and they don’t speak people language. Really? How could you blame them?! They won’t get it.

2. Documentary

I saw this documentary on the BBC knowledge about making deodorant. No biggie actually but it got me thinking that mass products like this would definitely need massive amounts of raw material, all to make the cap, the body, the deodorant, the label, the color, the roller, and everything. They produce thousands, if not millions each day. Now how did they pull off on getting raw materials every day?

3. Work

I work in mining which isn’t mining at the moment. However, I still get that ‘look’ when people start yapping about how bad mining is. It’s one of those big industries that take a lot, as does palm oil in point 1.  Hey, I’m not going to argue on how bad it is. But it will be done! Admit it! You love your gadgets, and electronics, and technology run by machines. And you love how cheap its been for the last 5 years. If it’s mass product, it’s gonna be cheaper, and that means point number 2. So guess what? Mining will be done!

4. Internet

I just love it. I do. Reading this is evidence that I do love the internet. Just saying

I was in a dark place sometime in my life and I have blamed almost all the industries, the malpractice, and anyone that came from big industries and making tons of money out of it but doesn’t seem to care about the environment. There are tons of environmental issues and it seems to just keep coming.

Now, I've crossed over and seen the other side. I've seen and learned a lot! I’ve also though hard around these 4 points and a few more, and I try and try to figure out how this mess can come to an end. I’m a bit megalomaniac you see so, these things about me as a hero saving the world, pops in mind all the time. Don’t worry, it usually fades. Now, the wisdom of my whole contemplation falls in to one brilliant answer which is, all of this was cause and could be saved by ME. Tadaaa! 

Didn’t catch that one coming now did you? Yes me, the consumer, which also means you, him, her, they, us, our ancestors, and our future children. The market has always driven production. With 5 billion (and maybe more) people in the world, we can justify… it’s a ginormous market. If every one wanted to take a shower and use soap with palm oil, say bye bye to Orangutans. If you want that latest playstation, then be ready to wipe up cute cuddly aminals (not typo) that you probably haven’t heard of before. That’s life! I'm not judging anyone, I'm just saying. That's what's gonna happen. 

For me, I try to reduce what I buy, use, and want. It's down right freakishly hard and I usually fail anyways. But I keep on trying. I have that guilt every time I buy something, which is good and it reminds me to think twice about a purchase. If I reduce the amount I consume, then something out there might stay alive a little longer. 

I believe wise consumerism is the answer to every single environmental problem. One important thing I learned about enviro science in school is, it’s human driven. I still believe it now. *pending on buying ipod nano but still browsing about it's cool function as a watch :P

I Used to Think... I Don't Anymore

I had this blog store... for.. more than a year! Better published than stored although its just a paragraph. 

I use to think that the ‘redneck’ dialect was pretty heinous, with all the white trash y’alls and stuff. I just recently (not!) watched ‘The Blind Side’. I changed my perspective. Now I refer it to the ‘American’ dialect. It’s how a lot of Americans talk. And for some reason, not really sure what… but Sandra Bullock made the hoedown talk a little more charming. Now I can see that it’s just another dialect, nothing less than another cultural characteristic. And I don’t see Britney Spears being as trashy anymore… oh how I’ve grown wise :) 

I still think that Hollywood is overrated though…. Not that it matters…

And it's a great movie. 

Picture was taken from here.